[Nature, bird sounds. Explosion!]
Scout: Move Cyclops, move!
Come on, come on, almost - aaahh!
Uhh, awww.
[Missles whistling.]
Woah, who the?
[Explosion!]
Aaaahh!!
[Hard impact, glass breaks. Dove coos]
Medic.
[Team Fortress intro theme music]
Medic [OS]: Wait, wait, wait – it gets better.
Medic [OS]: When the patient woke up, his skeleton was missing…
…and the doctor was never heard from again! Ah, ha ha!
[Heavy laughs loudly]
Ah, anyway…
…that’s how I lost my medical license. Heh.
[Squish noise. Dove coos.]
Archimedes, no!
It’s filthy in there. Uck.
Birds, ha ha ha.
Now, most hearts couldn’t withstand this voltage,
but I’m fairly certain your heart…
[Small explosion, fleshy impact and breaking glass.]
What was noise?
The sound of progress, my friend.
Medic [OS]: Ah, perfect.
Kill me.
Medic [OS]: Later.
Where was I? Ah, there we go.
Come on, come on.
[Maniacal laughter.]
[Worried laughter.]
Oh, that looks good.
Very nice there.
Should I be awake for this?
Ah heh. Well, no.
But as long as you are, could you hold your rib cage open a bit?
I can’t… seem…
Ahh!!
Oh, don’t be such a baby,
…ribs grow back!
No they don’t.
[Angelic music, healing noises.]
[Deep inhale.] What happens now?
Now? Hmm, hmm, hmm.
Let’s go practice medicine.
[Marching music.]
[Choir, harps.]
[Battle sounds.]
Medic!
[Music intensifies. Healing noise.]
[Ding!]
Yeah!
Woo hoo hoo!
Oh yeah!
Heavy [OS]: Doctor!
Are you sure this will work!?
Ha ha, I have no idea!
[Power-up, electrical noises.]
Yah! Ha ha!
Ha ha ha! I am bulletproof!
[Music crescendos – horns, guitar, choir.]
[Team Fortress closing theme music.]
[Engy plays guitar.]
Medic [OS]: That looks good. Very nice there.
Scout [OS]: Hey, thanks doc.
[Ding!]
Aw, man.
You would not believe how much this hurts.
[Muffled dove coos.]
Medic [OS]: Archimedes?